Having an estranged child is hard on parents, and getting coaching and support can help you reconnect.
When children become estranged, it’s easy (and understandable!) for parents to slip into helplessness and overwhelm. While it’s talked about more today than it was 10 years ago, parental estrangement is still considered taboo by many people, so it can be hard to find support and guidance as you seek to repair and reconnect with your child.
Parental estrangement is much more common that most people know. In fact, studies have put the number between 25-50% of adult children reporting current or past estrangement from a parent. If you’re a parent who is currently estranged from your adult child, you’re not alone, and you deserve support. There are pathways available if you’d like to try to reconnect and rebuild your relationship.
Signs you might want some help from a parent coach:
Your child is currently estranged or has requested no contact from you
Your child was estranged, and while that’s not technically true anymore, you still sense tremendous distance and discomfort in your relationship
You’re worried your adult child is considering going no-contact or becoming estranged from you
Your child is not attending family events, cancels at the last minute, or leaves early
You feel lost and confused about why your relationship with your child is so fraught
Your child has accused you of things you don’t agree happened
You sense your child has complaints but don’t know how to talk about it with them
Your child is living in your home but refuses to speak with you or interact with you
Find out about parent coaching and support when your child is estranged
When children become estranged it hurts the child, the parent, and often the extended family. While it might seem like parental estrangement is a new thing, it’s always happened. However, we are definitely at a time in history when it is more openly discussed.
Parental estrangement is more common than we think it is. Luckily, there is usually a way for parents to reach out appropriately and respectfully and begin to rebuild the relationship with their child.
The good news is that usually adults who are estranged from their parents would like to reconnect, but they don’t know how to navigate an adult relationship with their parent. Parents can make a difference by wholeheartedly embracing their children as they are and meeting them there with compassion.
Research says that about half of formerly estranged adults reconnect with their parents. How parents think about and behave during estrangement makes a big difference in the long-term outcomes.
Coaching can help
Parent coaching provides an opportunity for you to acquire new techniques and boost your confidence when dealing with an estranged child. While traditional sources such as books, magazines, social media, friends, and family can be valuable for typical parenting situations, they may not offer effective strategies for dealing with estrangement. Instead, you might want to try the strategic approach of parent coaching.
During coaching sessions, we’ll examine your child’s past and present circumstances and your relationship over time. Coaching provides a safe and nurturing space in which you can freely express and describe your child’s behavior and how much it affects you. You’ll have the opportunity to share your struggles in parenting without feeling ashamed. This is a judgement-free environment!
Next, we’ll work to figure out how you can begin the process of reaching out to your estranged child while respecting their boundaries. The good news is that often when you learn some new skills your child is willing to open doors that were previously slammed shut. Often we’ll see an estranged child begin to relax as you take thoughtful action towards reconnection.
Together, we will look for ways that you can reconnect for their sake and yours.
What you get with parent coaching for a difficult child
🌟 Information: Find out more about estrangement.
❤️ Understanding: Learn how you can start the process of reconnecting with your estranged child.
🌟 Scripts: Get some help learning how to talk to your child about reconnecting.
❤️ Techniques: Learn new techniques for parenting in a fragile parent-child relationship.
🌟 Recommendations: Get recommendations for articles, books, and resources. These will help you build up your confidence and understanding.
Parent coaching can make an immediate impact on how you understand estrangement and empower you to take meaningful action towards reconnecting with your child. Parent coaching can make things easier for you, your estranged child, and your whole family.
I’ve been trained to support parents who have highly sensitive children with emotional regulation challenges and complex trauma. This knowledge is something I teach all parents who work with me.
Most parents feel more confident in just a few sessions. Of course, we can continue working together as long as it’s helpful for you.
Find out about parent coaching and support when your child is estranged
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