As they say, “The only constant is change.” As much as we might want things to stay stable forever, we will all experience several major transitions in our lifetimes. These life transitions can range from celebratory events to devastating ones, but they all have one thing in common: they impact mental health.
Let’s talk about how you can manage your mental health during significant life transitions and take care of yourself the best you can.
How do life transitions affect mental health?
Life transitions are times of significant change that force you to readjust to a new reality. We all go through them, although some periods in life (such as young adulthood or the “empty nest” years) tend to come with more transitions than others.
Regardless of what type of life transition you’re going through, there’s no doubt these can be stressful times. While some life transitions cause more stress than others, your mental health can be impacted during any transitional period. The brain needs time to adjust to change, and these periods can make us feel like the rug has been pulled out from under us.
During big life transitions, you might experience painful emotions like sadness, anger, and fear. However, life transitions can also bring happy emotions. Most life transitions bring both painful and positive emotions—both can coexist.
Some of the significant ways life transitions can affect your mental health include:
Increased stress
Whether planned or unexpected, significant life changes typically raise overall stress levels. They force us to look ahead into the unknown future, which causes anxiety for many. As people, we tend to find comfort in routines and familiarity. When everything changes, it’s bound to make us feel more stressed than usual.
Stress has been linked to an increased risk of many different mental health conditions, including depression, anxiety, and substance use disorder. Stress can also cause people to rely more heavily on unhealthy coping mechanisms like reckless behavior or drug and alcohol abuse, which can further affect mental health.
Disrupts daily routines
Having routines is good for mental health. Routines are essential if you live with a mental health condition; having a solid daily routine can help you stick to your treatment plan and remember to prioritize self-care.
During major life transitions, many of the routines you’ve relied on disappear. You might feel ungrounded or spend your time in ways that aren’t good for you. For example, perhaps you used to go to the gym on the way home from work, but you now work from home, and exercise is no longer part of your daily routine. Instead, you spend the time scrolling social media.
Changing social support
Major life transitions can also impact the people in your social support network. Sometimes, the life transition can impact your major relationships themselves—for example, in divorce. But even when that’s not the case, you may find your relationships changing due to moving away, different life circumstances, or simply growing apart.
These can have significant impacts on your mental health. Research shows having a robust social support system is one of the best things for overall mental health. If you suddenly lose your social network due to a life transition, you might find your mental health suffering.
Grief
Lastly, grief often accompanies major life transitions. This could be due to the loss of a relationship, a job, or even your former identity. For example, it’s common for new parents to grieve who they used to be.
Experiencing grief doesn’t mean the life transition was a negative one. It’s entirely natural to grieve changes, even if they’re good ones. However, the grief you feel may have an impact on your overall mental health, especially if you don’t stop to take care of yourself.
What are the four types of life transitions?
Sharan B. Merriam, a professor at the University of Georgia and expert in adult education, says there are four types of major life transitions[1]:
Anticipated
Unanticipated
Non-event
Sleeper
Anticipated life transitions are expected changes—you knew they were coming. Some examples include getting married, having a child, leaving one job for another, and moving away to college. Even if you can expect these transitions, they can still be highly stressful.
Unanticipated life transitions are the opposite: changes you didn’t see coming and didn’t plan for. Some examples of non-anticipated life transitions include getting laid off, getting a divorce, illness, and the sudden loss of a loved one. Unanticipated life transitions can be some of the most painful.
Non-event life transitions occur when you expect something to happen but it doesn’t, leaving you to navigate what life will look like now. Examples include infertility (not being able to have a child when you always expected you would) and getting passed up for a promotion you were promised. But they can also be happy events—for example, you may have expected to develop a genetic disease that never materializes.
Sleeper life transitions are changes that sneak up on you over time. We don’t often notice these life transitions as they happen. For example, you might gradually drift away from a close friend. Or, on the positive side, you might not notice how much more skilled you’re getting at your job until one day you look around, and you’re the most senior person on your team.
All life transitions can cause stress, regardless of their type. Even transitions typically considered “happy” events, such as marriage, childbirth, and retirement, can disrupt your schedule and impact your mental health.
How to manage difficult life transitions and take care of your mental health
Major life transitions will impact our mental health regardless of how well we take care of ourselves. But with these tips, you can help yourself become more resilient against the effects of stress and change and navigate the process with your well-being intact.
Acknowledge your feelings
First, it’s essential to acknowledge how you’re feeling. Trying to suppress your emotions doesn’t make them go away; in many cases, dismissing emotions makes things more painful than they need to be.
Rather than push your emotions away, notice and acknowledge them. Try to validate yourself like you would a close friend. Understand any emotion is acceptable during times of great transition. No matter what you’re feeling, it’s okay. Allowing yourself the space to think can be a significant first step towards self-compassion.
Set reasonable expectations
Don’t put too much pressure on yourself while navigating this life transition. These changes are complex for everyone, and it’s okay not to get through it with perfect grace. In addition, sometimes life doesn’t turn out how you want it to, and these transitions may not end as you’d hoped. Having unrealistic expectations about what will happen during and after this transition can set you up for disappointment.
Set reasonable expectations for yourself and others while going through this life transition. For example, you don’t need to reinvent yourself after divorce completely, but you can set realistic goals like re-engaging with old hobbies and going to the gym three times a week. It may be unrealistic to expect yourself to “stay strong” and keep pushing forward every day after getting laid off; it’s more reasonable to expect you to have both good and bad days.
Prioritize social support
One of the biggest reasons major life transitions are so hard to cope with is they often involve a change in social support systems. But going through a transition doesn’t mean you need to go without social support altogether. Remaining connected to reliable loved ones is one of the best ways to protect your mental health when life turns upside down.
If you’ve lost your social support network due to a transition (like divorce or a big move), prioritize building a new one. Invest in relationships with colleagues, relatives, and acquaintances – remember, relationships take work! Joining a support group can also be a great way to get social support while going through an upheaval.
Practice self-compassion
Lastly, be kind to yourself. Transitions are complex for everyone, and it’s understandable if your mental health has suffered during this time. Normalize and validate your own experiences and feelings.
Treat yourself as you would a dear friend. Practice gentle and loving self-talk. Avoid blaming yourself for the transition or how you’re dealing with it. For example, you’d probably never ask a friend, “Why are you crying? Other people have it a lot worse.” This is minimizing and hurtful language – so don’t use it toward yourself, either.
Mental health treatment in Edmonds, WA
Unfortunately, there’s no way to avoid life transitions, and sometimes, these tumultuous changes may impact your mental health. Our mental health treatment programs at The Center • A Place of HOPE can help you overcome mental health problems that may have arisen as a result of significant life transitions, including depression, substance use, and PTSD.
Get in touch with us for more information about our programs.
1 – https://www.scirp.org/reference/referencespapers?referenceid=2211134
